Childhood Memories

Katyn and the Wailing Wall

Werner M gave us a piece of land some distance away from the house so that we could grow our own vegetables. Aunty Ilse very enthusiastically started making a few beds and put in seeds for radishes, tomatoes and lettuce. The beds looked totally out of proportion. Aunty soon was teased by the family that her beds indeed looked like graves. From then on the garden was called ‘Katyn’

http://www.katyn.org.au/.

Aunty soon got fed up with working in the garden, which turned out to be much too large for the effort she was willing to make. Mum and Mrs. T showed no interest in growing vegetables either. So what to do with the rest of the allotted piece of land?

Werner M came up with a solution. He offered to get his workers to plant carrots and potatoes for us. That way all the land could easily be used. Soon neat rows and rows of machinably planted crops appeared some distance away from the ‘Katyn-graves’. Further down on the site a huge rectangular basin was built and filled with water. Werner M was of the opinion that we needed this pool of water in case of any accidental air-attacks on our ‘Ausbau’. Should there be any fire, at least there would be some water close by which we could use.

To me this basin looked a bit like a swimming-pool. So I was planning to go into it as soon as the water had warmed up a bit. By June it seemed warm enough for a dip. However by that time the water had already turned quite dirty. I told Mum I did not mind a bit of algae in the water. I wanted to try to go into it anyway. Mum let me have her two-piece swimming costume, which she had sewn together for me. Mum came to the pool with me to watch me. The water came only up to my chest, which was just as well because I could not swim yet. I did not venture again into that pool at any other time. I felt once was enough!

And the ‘Wailing Wall’? Well, Werner M had a wall built for Aunty Ilse and Mum, but not for wailing but as a screen so they could sunbathe in the nude. They laughed when they called it ‘Wailing Wall’ . The local working families in the complex could not understand how anyone would want to sunbathe behind a wall!

Christmas 1943


I have a photo which was taken in Aunty Ilse’s livingroom when we were all sitting together for Christmas Eve celebrations. I gather Mrs T. took the picture since she isn’t in it. The photo is proof that my grandmother from Leipzig and cousin Renate were with us for Christmas 1943. Also in the photo are Aunty Ilse, Werner M and Mr. T as well as Mum and Edith T and my brother Bodo. I am in the picture too: You can see me holding up one of my Käthe-Kruse-Dolls. Mum had knitted a lovely new dress for this doll.

In the weeks before Christmas Mum loved to do some sewing of clothes as well as a lot of knitting for us children. When she did this we were not allowed in the living-room because she wanted the gifts to be a surprise for Christmas Eve. That meant of course that we had to be very, very patient. Naturally we thought Christmas Eve would never come!

Diary of Aunty Uta

Peter and I just finished our morning tea. We were  enjoying sitting outside in the warm winter-sun,  watching a wild dove, who  seemed to watch us, while she looked again and again towards a large bush. Was she thinking of building a nest there? We had found birds’ nests in the past in bushes near the front of our house. It was not like this with this bird. She just took off to look around elsewhere.

Our thoughts went to our neighbours, J. and S.,  who had  left  early in the morning to go on a holiday to Queensland. J. sometimes comes to talk to us when we’re sitting outside having our cup of tea. Peter says that J. won’t be around today.

So, why do we suddenly talk about the games we played as children?  I think we were comparing our different attitudes to being left alone. I say I cannot remember ever having been distressed when I was left to do something by myself or to go to sleep. I had my ‘Kinderzimmer’, where I was  often supposed to play on my own. When I was all by myself, I liked to invent people who would talk to me. I totally accepted that not all the time someone could be with me no matter how much I loved to be surrounded by people.

‘Yes’, Peter says,  ‘I played with my toys all by myself too. I can imagine your Mum would have been home with you more often than mine because your Mum did not have to go to work, whereas my Mum always went away, and I hated it, when she went away. I did not want her to go away.’

I say: ‘I don’t think, it bothered me, when Mum had to go somewhere without me. But I sure was  very happy  when I was allowed go on an outing somewhere. And I certainly loved it, when I was allowed  to play  with other children.’

Many children my age and older lived in the neighbourhood  in apartments of five-story high buildings. Our street was very secluded with no traffic to speak of. We would play ball-games in the street. We also played singing games, indeed lots of games with singing or reciting certain verses. It doesn’t take me long, before I start singing  songs and reciting verses that went with our games. I am amazed at myself. that I can still remember the melodies and   the words quite effortlessly! (If someone asked me to recite something like it on a stage, I probably would not remember a word!)

Diary of Aunty Uta

 

Four weeks ago I saw Dr. B. I’m aware I ought to see my GP this week to get my blood pressure checked again. I check my blood pressure at home all the time. Sometimes it’s high, sometimes it’s low. When I get very tired, it’s usually very low. And when I can’t relax, it’s high. If I could get my emotions more under control, maybe then my blood pressure woul normalise?

Two weeks ago I saw the surgeon who operated on my tongue on the 31st of May. He’s very pleased with the way the tongue has healed. In three months he wants to see me again.

One week ago I saw the dentist at the Holistic Dental Health Centre in Sydney.I made another appointment with him for cleaning of the teeth and to discuss several health aspects. Hubby made an appointment too. Each of us are going to see him for one hour in the afternoon of the 21st of Septemer, which is my 77th birthday!

Before I got up this morning I kept thinking of themes for my blog. I could write about our area. We have beautiful beaches very close by. There’s also a bit of rainforest left in our area. I could write about different aspects in retirement. Whyx are retired people always pressed for time?

I could write about all the travelling we did over the past fifteen months or so.We had quite a few lovely breaks away from home. After every trip we enjoy being home again. We think our home is paradise! If I knew how to include pictures I could show some of them in my blog. I would love to show some pictures of our home and surrounds!

I only just started blogging. So mayby there’s still hope that it’s not too late yet for me to learn a bit more about blogging.

My First Memory

The other day there was a blog suggested with the

above title. I always thought my memories go very far

back however I could not immediatley recall what

my very first memory may have been. After thinking

about it for a while now I came to the conclusion

that one of my first memories may have been about

sitting in a stroller and sleeping in a cot. I remember

how thrilled I was when after my third birthday I was

allowed to change from my cot into a single bed. I felt

really grown-up then! And from that age on I certainly

was not pushed around in a stroller anymore. I was able

to walk to where ever we were going.I can still remember

the little store-room where my stroller was kept, looking

at the stroller and thinking, ah yes, I was pushed aoun

in this when I was little.

I was born in 1934. It must have been before my third

birthday because I remember I was still using the cot

to sleep in, when my Mum said ‘Gute Nacht’ and she

explained to me that she was going out that night. I

should tell her to have a good time (“Mutti amüsier

dich gut!” and kiss her Goodnight. Actually this

definitely happened on a number of occasions.

At the time we did not have a live-in maid yet. Ma father

did not always work in the same town where we lived.

When my mother went out at night-time, it would often

have been with her sister. So I, little Uta, was left in

my cot all on my own in the apartment. When Mum left,

I would happily wish her a good time. I really wanted

her to have a good time. Because then my Mum felt

happy. I loved it when she felt happy. I cannot

remember ever having felt scared as a kid because I was

left alone for a while!

At the time it was quite normal in Germany for people

to leave their little children unattended at home.

 

Encouragement

Bianca Schlimm  encouraged me to

open up a Blog so I could publish all the memories

about my life. Bianca has been reading some of my

memories and found them interesting. Bianca herself

is an ardent blogger . I sometimes have very

interesting Email exchange with her. Personally I

love to stay in contact with people via Email. With

Email I usually have no problems whereas blogging

is very new to me and I find it very confusing

to work out what to do with a Blog.

Aunty Uta’s Memories 1943/44

CHILDHOOD MEMORIES

Towards the end of September 1943 we left Berlin to live in the country. We moved to a place called the ‘Ausbau’, which meant that eventually ‘more’ was to be added to the building.. It was a simple rectangular red brick complex with several entrances around the building. There was no plumbing or electricity. The entrance for us ‘Berliners’ was on the left side at the front of the building. We had a cellar, a groundfloor and two upper floors.

  Mum, my two younger brothers and I, shared a bedroom on the first upper floor. We also had a small kitchen and a living-room. I would sleep in the living-room when my dad came home on leave. Two maids, one Polish, the other Russian, shared two rooms on the top floor. All the rooms on the top floor had sloping ceilings. Our Polish maid was in her early twenties. Her name was Maria. She was very efficient and always rather serious.. The Todtenhausen Family, who lived on the groundfloor, employed Katja, the Russian maid, who was only eighteen and extremely fun loving.

   My mum’s sister, Aunty Ilse, also had her rooms on the first upper floor. She had a bedroom and a living-room. On the groundfloor, right underneath her upper rooms, she had a kitchen and a dining-room. She hardly ever used those downstairs rooms. Our friends from Berlin, the T. Family, occupied three rooms downstairs, namely a kitchen, a living-room and a bedroom, the same arrangement of rooms that we had on the upper floor.

   There was an additional larger room for storage under the sloping roof. T. Family and my Family stored in that room additional larger furniture which we wanted to save from the bombs in Berlin. — In that room Mum stored a lot of Boskop-apples during the cold season. They were neatly spread out on some straw. Come Christmas-time, other delicious food was also hidden somewhere amongst our stored furniture. It was very tempting for me to go exploring in that room! Mum noticed sometimes, that some food was missing. And I admitted, when questioned, that I had helped myself to some of the goodies. However I was never punished for doing such a thing. That shows, that Mum must have been quite tolerant. —

   On the same upper floor right under the roof was a playroom, which my brothers and I shared with eight year old Edith T. There was another room next to the playroom where Mrs. T.’s parents had stored some bedroom furniture. The parents were Mr. and Mrs. Braun. They had a business in Berlin. (They sometimes stayed at the ‘Ausbau’ in that bedroom in order to be with their family away from the bombs in Berlin.)

   Our toilets were “plumps-closets” some distance away from the house. Water for cooking and washing had to be fetched from a pump in the backyard. Fetching water from the pump kept both maids very busy indeed. For lights we had kerosine-lamps, for heating there were coal-fired stoves which could also be used for cooking. Everything was very basic.

   Gradually some changes were being made. The first big change was that our landlord had electricity laid on. All the workers who lived with their families in the other part of the building, received the benefit of electricity at the same time. This certainly was a very welcome improvement for them.

   The ‘Ausbau’ was built close to a dirt-track which meandered through wide open barley-, oat- and potato-fields. On the track it was a good half hour to walk to the next village. Bike-riding however made it a bit quicker.

   Werner Mann, the owner of all those fields that went on for miles and miles, was an acquaintance of Tante Ilse. He was apparently quite rich. He also owned extensive brick-works (Ziegeleien). It was said of him that he was a millionaire. He was our landlord, and he liked to spoil us. With no strings attached! Tante Ilse only had to voice a wish and Werner M. immediately did whatever he could to fulfill her wish. He spoilt us by constantly getting produce delivered to us: Potatoes, cabbage for making sauerkraut, wonderful treacle made of sweet-beets, and coal for our stoves.

   Even I, as a nine year old, could see that sixty year old Werner M. was hopelessly in love with Ilse. I also was quite aware, that she always kept him at a distance. He was happy to just be invited for ”Kaffee und Kuchen’ on weekends and to spend some time with all of us. He always came to visit on his bike. On his daily inspection tours of the workers in the fields he also went around on his bike. He owned coaches with horses, but hardly ever used those to go anywhere.

   When we were invited to his place (which people called ‘Schloss’), he would send the coach with a coachman to pick us up. Once in winter when there was plenty of snow, Werner M. sent a ‘Pferde-Schlitten’ (horse-drawn sledge). On this sledge we were wrapped up in blankets under a clear night-sky with the moon and lots of stars shining on us. It was unforgettable and one of the rare highlights in our otherwise pretty dreary country-life existence.

   The place where Werner M. lived, did not look like a castle at all, even though people called it ‘Schloss’. It was not even a mansion but a rather large, but fairly plain house. There was a huge, fenced in veggie garden next to the house. I have seen the veggie garden only once. However I was very impressed by it, because it seemed to be so very large.

   When we moved to the ‘Ausbau’, Ilse had already been divorced from Adolf Schlinke. It was obvious that Werner M. would have liked to marry Ilse. However, it never came to that. Ilse married Helmut Lorenz on July 20th, 1944.

                     CHILDHOOD MEMORIES CONTINUED

It was a big thrill for me to go exploring amongst the furniture in that big storage-room: and especially in the weeks before Christmas!

Mum used to store lot of goodies for the Christmas season. It was very exciting for me to find out what new things had been stored in that big room. I remember seeing huge chunks of nougat (a yummy hazelnut-paste) as well as heart-shaped marzipan-pieces. There was a pot with sweetened thick milk. Sometimes I dipped my finger into it to lick this wonderful sweet stuff! I also liked to eat a few of the stored raisins and prunes! Smells of ginger bread and apples: It made me feel that Christmas was something to be looking forward to.

Where on earth did Mum get all those things from? It was war-time, wasn’t it? We were in the midst of war! I knew very well where all this came from. The parents of Mrs.T. had a distributing business. It was called ‘Backbedarf en Gros’. That meant they delivered goods to bakeries and cake-shops. Even in the midst of war deliveries of the above mentioned goods still took place! Of course there were shortages, but basically most things were still available.

Mr.T. and Mrs.T., as well as Aunty Elsa and Mum were all good friends. Every Saturday night they came together for some card games. Eight year old daughter Edith and I were allowed to stay up late on those nights. For hours we were watching the adults playing cards and at the same time entertaining ourselves with doodling on bits of paper. At around ten o’clock some cake and hot chocolate as well as coffee would be served. But the maids did not have to do the serving, They were already in their rooms at this hour. The cake was usually freshly baked, very fluffy yeast cake topped with delicious butter-crumbs and filled with a thick custard. Hmm yummy!

Mr.T. would stay in Berlin during the week, where he was employed by his parents-in-law. Being over forty, he was not required to join the German army. Mr.T. always brought some sweet goodies along when he came home from Berlin for the weekend.

During the summer of 1944 Mr.T. and Mum liked to go on their bikes to a neighbouring Nursery where they were able to trade sweets for fresh produce. Edith and I were often allowed to go along with them on our bikes. The sweets were traded for strawberries or cherries or gooseberries as well as peaches and apricots, and later on in the year for pears and apples. I remember the Boskop apples were still in season in late autumn. The owner of the nursery was a well-off looking middle-aged woman who was very fond of sweets and loved to trade her produce. At one time we found out that she thought Mr.T. and Mum were a couple and we girls were sisters. Laughing joyfully, Mum and Mr.T. explained, that this was not so.

Only once as far as I remember were we shown into the lady’s home. Mr.T. made complimentary remarks about the interior of the house. He said it showed off the owner’s good taste. I liked the lady’s house a real lot too. Our families used to have well furnished apartments in Berlin. But this modern looking villa in the midst of the nursery really was something else. My feelings were I would very much like to live in a place like that. However we had to be happy with our accomodation in the Ausbau. To us children it was always pointed out, to be happy that we did not have to live amongst the bomb raids in Berlin. I’m pretty sure that by myself I felt that I’d rather live in Berlin, bomb-raids or not. I think to children bomb-raids usually didn’t seem as scary as to the adults. At the time we children had had no experience yet how absolutely horrible those bomb-raids could become.

In 1990, soon after the Fall of the Wall, I went with my family to have a look at the area where we used to be hidden away from the bomb-raids. We discovered that the nursery as well as the lady’s house had completely vanished. There was nothing left of the ‘Ausbau’ either!

In 1943, when we had lived at he ‘Ausbau’ only for a couple of months, Mrs. T. delivered a healthy daughter in a regional hospital. The day after the baby was born, it may perhaps have been a Saturday or Sunday, Mr. T. and Edith went for the forty-five minute bike-ride to the Hospital. I was thrilled that I was allowed to go with them! The baby was on the tiny side and soon called Krümel (tiny crumb). Edith had a pet-name too. She was often called Honkepong.

As soon as Mrs.T. came home from hospital, there was a nurse waiting for her to take charge of the baby. Mr.T. said something like: “Katja is a very nice girl, but I would not trust her with our new born baby. I am glad that Nurse is here to help my wife to look after our Krümel.”

Nurse used for herself the bedroom next to our playroom. Sometimes she sat with us children in the playroom. Since Christmas was approaching, she taught us how to make some Christmas decorations. I was very impressed, because I was nine years old and nobody had ever taught me anything like it! Nurse also made sure, we learned our Christmas poems. We had to be prepared to recite them to Santa on Christmas Eve!

 Maria, our Polish maid, had been with us since before my little brother was born. He regarded Maria as his ‘Dah-dah’, that is he always called her ‘Dah-dah’. By the end of January 1945 we had to flee from the ‘Ausbau’ as the Russians were approaching fast. We went to Berlin first and then by train to Leipzig to stay at Grandmother’s place. Maria remained in Berlin with her Polish fiancee, who was a butcher.

 When we parted from Maria, little brother Pete had just turned three. Yet he must have missed her for quite a while since she had always looked after him and I am sure, he loved her very much and she loved him. Mum always trusted Maria, who was in every way caring and efficient at the same time. Mum was always impressed how quickly Maria did all the house-work. Any dirty dishes were washed immediately. She was indeed capable of doing all the housework and Mum was happy to let her do just about everything. An exception was the baking of a large cake on Saturdays, which Mum loved to do herself.

Maria always made some potato-salad for the weekend. I watched how she did it. To the peeled and sliced potatoes she added finely cut onion, some oil, pepper and salt. Then she poured hot vinegar-water over the potatoes as a finishing touch. The huge salad-bowl was placed outside on a shelf near the stairway so the salad could cool down. I often helped myself to some of the warm salad when nobody was looking, because I loved to eat the salad when it was still a little bit warm. It was the same every Saturday. I watched Maria preparing the salad and placing it on the shelf outside. Then it did not take long before I had a good taste of it!

Friday night was the night for our bath. Maria placed a small tin-tub on the kitchen-floor. She carried several buckets of water from the outside pump to the kitchen. Some of the water she heated on the kitchen-stove in an especially huge pot. I was always the first one to use the bath-water, then it was brother Bob’s turn. Little brother Pete was always the last one. Some hot water was added for everyone, but still the water must have been quite dirty for little Pete after Bob and I had had our baths!

When Maria first came to live with us, she knew very little German. However she was determined to learn German quickly. She liked to ask Bob and me how to pronounce certain words. She also asked me how to write those words in German. Mum often praised Maria, that she was willing and able to learn quickly. This applied to everything she did. She was an amazingly efficient person. A ‘pearl of a maid’ people would say of her. Maria was a city girl. She came from Lodz, which was called ‘Litzmannstadt’ at the time. We had spent the summer-months of 1941 at Zokolniki (near Lodz) and that was when Maria was assigned to us as a help. Mum liked Maria and wanted her to come with us when we went back to Berlin. Maria told me later that she did not want to leave Poland. But she had not been given the choice to stay in her own country.

When Katja arrived, we could see that she was very different from Maria. She was a country-girl from Russia. She never learned German as well as Maria did. She could never be trusted to do all the house-work by herself. Mrs.T. always had to supervise her and do certain things herself because Katja took too long to learn to do it properly. But we all loved Katja. She was always cheerful and full of beans. As a country-girl she did not know certain things that a city-girl had been brought up with. Maria took to instructing Kartja about certain things. I think they communicated in German. After they finished work in the evening, they had plenty of time to stay in their rooms together and keep each other company. Both girls always had to get up early. During summer, school-classes in the village started as early as seven o’clock. That meant, I had to get up at six o’clock to get ready for school. Mum never got up that early. But Maria always came down at six o’clock to start working for us. She often had to do Pete’s linen early in the morning, which I am sure was not one of her favourite tasks.

 

Diary of Aunty Uta

Tuesday, 5. 7. 2011

Yesterday I saw Dr. B for the first time. My own GP had already ten patients enrolled for the morning. I did not feel like waiting around just to get a new script. So I enrolled for the next available doctor. ‘May I take your blood pressure?’ Dr. B asked. ‘Sure,’ I said.

When my blood pressure turned out to be quite high, I explained to Dr. B that I had been rushing a bit before I went to see him. In a very gentle voice he responded by saying:

‘We all feel rushed at times. However it may be quite dangerous if because of feeling rushed the blood pressure constantly reaches too high levels. Do you take your blood pressure tablet every day?’

‘Yes, every morning, Doctor. – I just need a new prescription.’ – ‘All right, I give you your prescription, but I want you to see your GP in four weeks time so he can check your blood pressure again.’

I had told the doctor about the cancerous growth on my tongue, also that it had been successfully cut out during a procedure at the hospital. After having looked at my files in the computer, he asked me whether I was going to see the specialist, Dr. P, again. I said yes, I was going to see him again this month.

‘My tongue feels all right now, Doctor. I don’t think there’s anything to worry about.’ The doctor gave me the script for my blood pressure tablets. He asked, whether I wanted to talk about something else. But I there was nothing else that bothered me that morning. I just wanted the repeat prescription! I was only too happy to leave the consultation room, script in hand, after having signed the form for Medicare. I liked Dr. B. I thought he tried to be very helpful.

Since that conversation with Dr. B I keep thinking about my problem with blood pressure. Why is it that I feel so easily rushed? Why does the blood pressure immediately go sky high with just a little bit of rushing? I am seventy-six. Why don’t I slow down a bit more? If I did everything really slowly I”m sure I’d have no problem with blood pressure!

The Thursday Heart Move Exercises at Heininger House are just called ‘Gentle Exercises’ now. Martha is a very good instructor. She sees to it that the exercises remain gentle. Whenever someone in the group cannot cope with all of the gentle exercises that person is encouraged to sit down and do the exercises sitting down. Some of the exercises we all do sitting down anyway. The exercises are for senior citizens. Twenty people are enrolled in the class. Each of us pays only two Dollars fifty Cents for the one hour session.

After having exercised for about thirty minutes we have a little break when glasses of water are being offered. Some people use the break to go to the toilet. The exercises are so slow moving with lovely accompanying music that I hardly get a chance to feel out of breath. Since everything is done slowly, I usually don’t find it too difficult to keep moving for the whole hour. I find the exercises improve my balance! And they seem to be good breathing exercises as well.

In my reply to Bookjunkie I refer to walking and swimming.

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