4th of December 2020












4th of December 2020












I have two daughters. Both of them are still in full time employment. They do depend on these jobs. During the past few months, while Peter had terminal cancer, they sacrificed already a lot as far as their jobs is concerned., because they were constantly helping out in looking after Peter, so that he could stay at home during the final stages of his bone cancer. They admit they would like to be able to catch up on their work now. Over the Christmas period they had some respite, which I felt they very much needed. Because of the Coronavirus both can work mostly from home. But when there are too many distractions, working from home is not always possible.
I know, that Peter on his deathbed kept worrying about the jobs of his daughters. He kept saying they should not neglect their work because of him. They kept assuring him, that it was alright. Their employment was such, that they could always get compassionate leave when it was needed. And I reckon this says a lot about employment conditions in Australia, well at least for those people that are lucky enough to be in full time employment!
Now to my son, who is already retired and lives on his own in regional Victoria. Even though his father had not much time to live and needed constant care, and even though a most senior Oncologist attested to this, and even though people were always told in special circumstances the border could be crossed on compassionate grounds, Martin, the son, still was not able to get a permit withiout going on a 14 day quarentine first. This stressed out Martin no end, for he did not know how many days his father would have to live! Peter could have died any day, really. Nobody could forecast how many days he would have to live. We were just told that it was unlikely that he’d still be alive by Christmas.
Miraculously, on the 23rd of November the border between NSW and Victoria was opened! Martin could finally rush to his father’s deathbed. And he could bring his dog along in his car. Millie, the dog, was loved by all in the family. She was no bother at all, for Martin took excellent care of her. He treated her really like his baby! He also helped tremendously by sharing in the care of his more and more disabled father.
Millie, the dog, was great therapy for everyone, especially for Peter. On the 12th of December Peter took his final breath. And one day after the funeral, that is on Sunday, the 20th of December. Martin had to rush back to Victoria. He arrived with Millie at his place in Benalla just before the border was closed again! Originally I had planned to go along with Martin to Benalla and stay there for a few weeks. However, at the same time it had been decided to have the family over to my place here in Dapto for our usual Christmas Eve celebrations. Martin having to rush off so suddenly did bring me sort of out of balance. I thought I could not go with him because of our Christmas Eve celebrations. But maybe I should have given the celebrations a miss and gone off with Martin – Who knows?
Martin hopes, the border can be opened again soon. He says he is already preparing my room, that is I am always welcome to have his spare bedroom and to stay with him for as long as I like. At the moment he feels kind of useless, because he cannot do anything for me.
I must say, these border closures are of course necessary because of the Coronavirus. Trying to keep the virus in check. for sure is very important. This brings a lot of peoples’ lives on hold! These closures turned out to be frustrating, especially for Martin. And I must say, for me too. So, sooner or later I have to get over it. It just takes some time. Overall we have been lucky. We must be grateful for the timing, I mean Peter was able to die in peace surrounded by all his loved ones! This is really something, when so many people are immensely distressed because they cannot see their dying loved ones because of the virus.
Is it only a bit over two weeks since Martin had to rush back to Benalla? I guess in about a week for most people the holiday time will be over. So from next week on we might be able to organise some of the planned renovations. I trust Caroline and son-in-law Matthew to do this for me. The question is, will I be able to escape to some other place, while the painters start working here? And then comes the laying out of a new floor! I reckon, it would be nice, if I did not have to be here, when all this is going on.
hen Australians want to go on holidays right now, they have to book holidays in the state they live in. The hospitality business suffers a lot because of this. Bookings in other states that had already been made, had to be cancelled! The borders are only going to be opened again, when for instance the clusters of Corona cases in Sydney and Melbourne are adequately handled, and when there aren’t any new cases for a while. Fortunately the tracking system works here pretty well. As soon as they find out that there is the possibility that you came into contact with someone who became a known case, they urge you to get tested. Thousands and thousands of people get tested every day to find out the people who might be carrying the virus. The bad thing is, that virus carriers, who do not show any symptoms, can still infect a lot of other people!
https://auntyuta.com/2016/01/28/our-guest-bedroom/
https://auntyuta.com/2014/08/26/she-is-my-friend/
https://auntyuta.com/2014/08/27/corinna-and-the-family/
Today I looked up the above posts. I would recommend that you may perhaps want to look at one or all of them if you are in any way interested in my long, long life and in some of my family.
I found this post in my ‘memories’ section. Maybe this is an opportune time to reblog this post!
In the past I stuck mainly to journal or diary writing, or I tried to come to grips with some of my childhood memories. Only occasionally did I resort to fiction writing in the form of a short story. As far as my reading tastes are concerned I must say, in my younger days I always preferred reading novels: Only occasionally would I read a short story.
These days the time I spend reading novels seems to be getting less and less, even though I still like novels a lot. Today for instance I spent half an hour reading a short story. It turned out I did very much love this story. It was a story I had been reading many years ago and I could still remember the subject of this story since this is a subject that interests me very much: What happens to a mother when she…
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Big Loss
Our Dream Home, is this it?
All the Sundays after Peter died
Today is the4thSunday after Peter died/On th 8th of November, that is just a few weeks ago, when Peter was still alive and able to visit the local doctor (with Olivia’s help that is), yes on the 8th of November I republished one of the posts from November 2011.
Now, I assume that most of my readers would not like to go to the trouble of looking up all these posts. However, for me it was most interesting to read through all of them again. It helps to give some kind of substance to what I do remember about the past nine years or so. These posts show me, that already nine years ago I could not help myself thinking about what would happen when Peter and I would come into our eighties. Well, Peter made it to 85 without any significant changes in our surroundings. I am 86 already. I must admit I am not at all used to organising some trades people to do any necessary repairs. Peter always did this. He always pointed out to me: “You can do it if you like!” But did he really want me to do it? I don’t think so. Whenever he was supposed to show me something, he soon got impatient and took over, doing whatever needed to be done rather himself. I must admit, I am a rather slow learner and always got scared I would not learn fast enough or forget soon again, how to do certain things. This also went very much so with work on the computer too. Whenever something went wrong on the computer he would take over totally, yes, maybe showing me a few things but without making sure that I had understood it properly. And it was very hard for me to ask for repeat instructions. He would just say: “But I showed you already!” and leave it at that.
In a lot of ways I am now totally dependent on the help of my children. I am extremely lucky to have three capable and loving children. But it is difficult for me to accept that I may have to disrupt their lives too much. I would like to have a certain type of independence where I feel that I am still capable of making my own decisions in every way and where I have not to told by anyone how to live my life!
One of my concerns at the moment is the ever increasing need for an overhaul of my backyard. When I look at that post from 22nd of August 2016 about the loss of three of our big trees, I am astounded how this backyard has changed again over the last four years or so!