This picture was taken on Monday, 11th May 2015, near Sydney University when we went to a court hearing in Glebe.
On the 11th and on the 12th of May we went to the Coroner’s court hearing about the circumstances of our daughter’s death.
State Coroner’s Court of New South Wales
The State Coroner ensures that all deaths are properly investigated. If necessary, an inquest into the death is held. Coroners can also recommend measures to prevent future deaths.
An inquest is a court hearing where the Coroner considers evidence to determine the identity of the deceased and the date, place, manner and cause of death of the deceased. Read more about the steps involved in an inquest.
I mention in this post, that the service on board the P & O Liner was excellent. Well, apart from the Irish steward, we also had a personal cabin steward. Because of the two babies, we were given a first class cabin on C Deck! There worked any number of dark coloured Indians on board this ocean liner. There was a bulletin published every day by the captain and crew. More than half the passengers were from Britain. a lot of them subsidized migrants to Australia. The rest of the passengers were subsidized migrants from Germany. In the cabin next to our cabin was a young German migrant family with kids the same age as our kids. We are still good friends with the rest of the family. Unfortunately, Karl-Heinz, the father, and Gudrun, their daughter died an early death. We met the other day Doris, the mother, and Michael the son. After ten years in Australia the family had gone back to Berlin, where Karl-Heinz established a well going business for alarm installations. Michael is leading this business now.
The SS STRAITHAIRD had come from Southampton via Cuxhaven to go to Port Melbourne, Australia. The voyage took five weeks. The service on board the P & O Liner was excellent. At mealtimes we had a table-steward to look after eight people at our table.
Our steward was Irish and always quick on the move. He assumed, everyone would be eating all three courses for every meal. That meant, he usually had the dessert already waiting on his serving table before everyone had finished their second course.
One day two people refused to have dessert. Our steward looked pleadingly at me and Peter, for he knew us to be good eaters: We always emptied our plates! “Please, would you like a second dessert? See, I am not supposed to take it back to the kitchen,” he said. My husband and I gladly accepted a second dessert…
Peter always said, that he is only half of one. I was the other half! So, what am I now? A lonely widow!
Actually, living on my own is not all bad. Some doctors, that I saw recently, told me, I could live to be 100.
Is it possible to love life that much, that one would wish to live for that long? After all, it is very unlikely, that a one hundred year old would still have any kind of partner: Just memories, memories . . . .
Oh, no. I will keep Peter, and you, in my thoughts, prayers, and meditations, Uta. I want the very best for Peter…for his health and safety. It makes me said that you cannot be with him. (((HUGS))) and for both of you PS…I clicked on “like” button because that video is wonderful and made such an impression on me. My Mom lived to 97 and I will never forget so many of the things she said to me…especially in her last year of life.Reply
auntyutaEditI thank everyone for all your good wishes! Peter is in a cancer ward now. Caroline stayed with him all day. They had to wait in Emergency until Peter could be transferred to the ward on level 7. Visiting hours are there from 11 to 1 and from 5 to 7. For each visiting time only one person is allowed to visit. That means only one person can visit in the morning and the same only one person towards nighttime. Caroline and Matthew drove me to the hospital last night. That was good that I could see him then. But both Caroline and Matthew had to stay outside waiting for me to take me back home. Today, Sunday, daughter Monika wants to visit her Dad at 5 pm. We have not worked out yet, who is going to visit at 11 am today! I hope Peter had a good night in hospital, for he often gets breathing difficulties during the night and has very interrupted sleep because of that. He has his mobile phone with him and can call us later. Everyone is very friendly in hospital. So Peter is well looked after.
I copy here my above ‘Private’ Diary Post from Saturday, 25th 0f April 2020:
‘Everyone has by now some idea about the Coronavirus. It definitely has brought a lot of changes to our lives. How will all this end? Nobody knows for sure. We may have some ideas how it might end. However we cannot really know it, not exactly . . .
I think back to World War Two. Eighty years ago at this time of the year we had already eight months of war behind us. I was still only five years old. School started after Easter. But I was not allowed to go. I was considered to be still too young!
Our war in Germany ended on the 8th of May 1945. By then I was a ten year old. I emigrated to Australia in April 1959 with my husband and two daughters who were five months and sixteen months old. I left fourteen postwar years in Germany behind and started a new life in Australia. My dear little family did thrive in Australia. We did not make it to become rich. But we had a life in Australia, a good life. Neither Peter, my husband, nor I ever regretted our move to Australia. Yes, Australia has been very good to us!
Over the years we made a number of visits to our old country. We were amazed how prosperous Germany had become. Still, we were always glad to be going back to Australia. Four years ago, at the beginning of June, Peter and I made our last trip to Germany. Most of the time we stayed in Berlin, our home-town. Our son Martin had come with us and stayed with us, which was good. At the same time our daughter Caroline had come to Berlin with Matthew. They loved to get to know this interesting city. However on short notice they suddenly had to leave: Daughter Caroline had been called to Darwin on a job opportunity.
Towards the end of June daughter Monika had come to Berlin with all her tribe, that is with Natasha who is one of her daughters, and also with her twin sons, Troy and Ryan, as well as Ryan’s Partner Ebony and their sons Lucas and Alexander. They were on a tour from London to Paris to Switzerland to Berlin, where they stayed for nine days only, and then back to London, touring England a bit and then back home to Australia.
Why I mention our stay in Berlin four years ago is because that is where Peter first noticed something wrong with his bladder: Often he could hardly make it to the toilet on time! He always had to run, run, run to the toilet. A few weeks later in Australia a test showed that there was a tumour in his bladder!
For two years Peter received BCG treatment at Wollongong Hospital.
(BCG stands for Bacille Calmette Guerin. BCG is a weakened (attenuated) version of a bacteria called Mycobacterium bovis which is closely related to Mycobacterium tuberculosis, the agent responsible for tuberculosis. … BCG is also used as an adjuvant to stimulate the immune response and in cancer chemotherapy.)
Peter ended up with a battery of specialists: Urologists, an oncologist, cardiologists, a skin specialist, a dentist, hearing specialists, an optometrist and an ophthalmologist.
About two years ago heart bypass surgery was suggested because of Peter’s blocked arteries to the heart. Because of Peter’s brittle bones and his advanced age Peter decided he did not want any bypass surgery.
Recently Peter ended up in Wollongong Hospital with severe kidney pain. After successful surgery to drain the kidney and the insertion of a stent to the bladder the pain is gone. But Peter gets off and on severe back pain. Sitting in a comfortable easy chair usually helps him to immediately get rid of the pain. Also when he lies down on his side, the pain does go away instantly. However some Ex-ray revealed now, that Peter has the start of bone-cancer, which means that his bladder cancer has spread further.’
With the bone cancer spreading, Peter had no chance of survival. Peter died on Saturday, the 12.12.2020. For the last few weeks of his life he was given palliative care at home with daughters Monika and Caroline, as well as son-in-law Matthew and son Martin doing all the necessary caring with me mostly just sitting by his site.
After we had returned from our Berlin visit in 2016, I thought I would never again be able to go for another visit to Berlin. Surprise, surprise, it so happened, I did visit Berlin again in May of this year! We, my daughters and I, as well as one granddaughter, had just ten full days in Berlin. But I was able to see a lot of family and friends during this short stay in Berlin. So, I was glad, that I was given this chance for another visit.
“Located at 5 Crown Lane Wollongong, Kneading Ruby offers authentic woodfire pizzas & bespoke dishes made to share. Produced traditionally with the freshest seasonal produce, join us for a dining occasion with a casual modern approach.”
We had a lovely time on that day sharing some very good food. We had booked a table for eight.
At the moment the great news is, that finally we are actually planning to build a deck: It looks it may be happening very soon now!
On the following Sunday, 16th May, Peter would have been 86. I am going to have on that day some family and friends over for afternoon coffee and cake in memory of Peter.
So wonderful to have Mother’s Day memories AND to make new Mother’s Day memories! I love that you will be honoring Peter on the day of his birth. (((HUGS))))
I DO CONTINUE WITH A BIT OF DIARY FOR TODAY, 24TH OF MAY 2022:
For Dinner tonight, I wanted to have a bit of wine. But I had no wine left, none whatsoever. What to do? I checked the cupboard. Voila, some of last year’s DIARONNO was left. I had a bit of it with some Tonic Water. It was delicious together with my well cooked beautiful Dinner! 🙂
In last year’s Diary from the 10th of May I mention, how much I love to spend time with my son Martin. Actually, he rang me today. Following our phone conversation, I wrote to him an email about our recent trip to Berlin. Here is some of what I wrote about that trip:
We saw Ilse and Finn three times; and Peter Uwe and Astrid
I saw probably four times. I saw Corinna and Walter once;
also, Hendrick and family I saw once, Bergers once, Nadine
twice, and Petra once. Some people I saw in our apartment
only, other people I saw only at their place, or meeting
somewhere for a nice meal.
By the way, Michael Berger besides losing his father and
sister Gudrun, he also lost his wife to cancer some time
ago. His two daughters are married, each with three
children. Gudrun had two sons. One son is married
with three children also. 🙂
So, Doris has already nine great-grandchildren! 🙂
We saw Nadine’s partner, Stefan, and her little daughter,
Lina, who turned three on the 16th of May. (Dad’s birthday!)
We celebrated Ilse’s birthday at her place on the 13th of May, and then
with the whole family in an Indian restaurant on the 14th of May.
Restaurant PapadamDie ganze Genusswelt Indiens erwartet hungrige Besucher im PAPADAM in der Scharnweberstraße 6 – 7 in Reinickendorf. Das Papadam-Team hat sich eine klare Mission zum Ziel gesetzt: Wir möchten nicht nur ein sehr gutes indisches Restaurant sein, sondern Ihnen eine Wohlfühloase bieten, in der Sie gerne verweilen.papadam-berlin.de
Wednesday, the 18th of May, was the day when Bergers met us
for lunch at an Italian Restaurant at Prager Platz. And Iles and Finn
San Marino – Prager PlatzWILLKOMMEN IN BERLIN´S “LA SERENISSIMA” San Marino ist die älteste bestehende Republik der Welt – seit dem Jahr 301 unabhängig. Mitten in Italien, zwischen den Regionen Emilia-Romagna, Marken und Rimini, ist San Marino mit nur 60,57 km² zwar winzig klein, jedoch sehr fein gelegen.www.sanmarino-berlin.de
My Carpal Tunnel Relief Operation is on Thursday, the 16th of June! 🙂
Back to Berlin: The 16th of May was the only day that I did spend just
with Caroline, Monika, and Krystal! We had ‘Ice Becher’ at Victoria Luise
Platz. And then we went by Public Transport to the Ka-de-We. where the
four of us had a good time in the Restaurant at the Top, thinking of Papa. 🙂
We also did buy a few things at the Ka-de-We. I bought an old fashioned,
We were lucky the cafe was open today, Wednesday, the first of May. We had some good breakfast there and ‘bowls’ of excellent coffee. Then we drove a bit around the backroads of this small town called Berry. Our first stop was here:
There were still a lot of wreaths and flowers from Anzac Day.
From Wikipedia:
“Anzac Day (/ˈænzæk/) is a national day of remembrance in Australia and New Zealand that broadly commemorates all Australians and New Zealanders “who served and died in all wars, conflicts, and peacekeeping operations” and “the contribution and suffering of all those who have served”.[1][2] Observed on 25 April each year, Anzac Day was originally devised to honour the members of the Australian and New Zealand Army Corps (ANZAC) who served in the Gallipoli Campaign, their first engagement in the First World War (1914–1918).”
Berry Station is just down this road!
Our next stop was the Berry Swimming Pool that was closed for the winter months from April to November.
Here is some Wikipedia information about this town :
“As of 2013, the small town has a variety of arts and craft shops, restaurants and cafes, a hotel, club, post office, supermarket and other businesses, including an ambulance station, general practitioner and a chemist.
Kangaroo Valley has a bus service to Nowra and Moss Vale. Priors Scenic Express also provides a long-distance coach service to Bowral, Mittagong, and Sydney as well as to the Shoalhaven and South Coast, as far as Narooma.”
We stopped at a very nice cafe in the main street.
Oh yes, we had not great difficulty pretending it was 1995!!
On the way home we stopped at the Robertson Pie Shop for a cup of refreshing tea and some delicious fruit pie.
Here is a link to a post Peter (Berlioz) wrote seven years ago:
Among other things you find the following in Peter’s post:
“The other day, on the First of May actually, we were enticed by the beautiful sunshine to drive into the country site. Not far from where we live, about 70 km is Kangaroo Valley. On the way there and back we passed through Berry, a town on the Princes Highway. It is “old charm” town where on weekends well to do people from Sydney come to visit and do some shopping for things that do not come from China, like craft work etc. . . .”
“When the Cenotaph was unveiled in 1921, a tree was planted for each of the dead along Alexandra Street, at the base of each of these trees a bronze plaque was set recalling the soldier to whom the tree was originally dedicated. . . .”
Peter also did mention in his post from 2012 the Cenotaph in Berry that we visited again today:
“We drove a bit further and suddenly saw the town’s Cenotaph erected for the fallen of the two World Wars. The floral tributes from the recent ANZAC Day were still to be seen. I realised then, that perhaps Berry represents, in equal parts, the modern and the old Australia, and the fallen soldiers are the connecting element of this duality. Without knowing it they gave their lives for just the Australia we have become. Migrants of the countries that were fighting in the Great War of 1914/18 are now here. . . .”
In my post from seven years ago I mentioned the Berry Sourdough Cafe in Prince Alfred Street:
” . . . we drove on to Berry where we had some pies for lunch. We also bought some cake at the Milkwood Bakery. This is a newly opened bakery in Queen Street. They are a branch of the Berry Sourdough Cafe in Prince Alfred Street, which is famous for very good breakfasts.” So today, seven years later but also on the first of May, we did actually have breakfast at the cafe in Prince Alfred Street.
“Early in the morning we heard a song about the Hampden Bridge and we thought why not go there today? It seems to be the right thing to do. First of May is not a holiday in Australia. But what the heck, our life is a constant holiday and we can go to the Kangaroo Valley, that is where the bridge is, any time we want. So off we went. The Illawarra is a beautiful part of NSW and we are proud to live here. . . . “
Today we passed Hampden Bridge again, but did not stop there but drove on to the village of Kangaroo Valley.
If the parents separate amiably the children usually learn to cope with the separation. Some children may on the outside cope all right, even if there is constant struggle between the parents. Children can probably cope all right if they happen to be totally in agreement with the parent they live with.
I do not want to make this too theoretical. So I just start with a bit of my own experience. I fall into the category of the child who is constantly torn between the parents. To my mind this is a pretty bad state to be in. I think I can say that my parents’ relationship was very much a love/hate relationship. The way I see it, it was not the right kind of love that led my parents to each other. Their outlooks and aspirations in life were extremely different. There were separations due to conditions under the Hitler regime and to the disaster of World War Two. After the war they just could not live together any more, that is my mother refused to live with my father. I constantly heard her saying bad things about him. Her hate was unrelenting. She showed not one iota of compassion towards him. My two younger brothers and I lived with my mother. There was no question that we could have lived with my father at the time.
My parents got divorced when I was sixteen on the request of my mother for she wanted to marry someone else. It turned out, the man, who wanted to marry Mum, was not the right man for her. She decided she would rather not marry him. Instead she made an enormous effort to get some secure employment and become independent.
When I was in my twenties, Dad married a second time. This time a widow who luckily was just the right person for him. Sadly they had only a short life together. Dad died of cancer aged 62.
My parents had been in enormously strenuous circumstances after the end of WW II. Till the end of the 1950s they both struggled enormously to make ends meet. Dad died in 1966, Mum died in 1994 aged 83.
Mum had two sisters and a brother. One of the sisters, who never had any children, divorced her first husband and had a very good marriage with her second husband. This was ‘meine’ Tante Ilse. She played a big part in my life. She was a very motherly woman.
Dad was one of six in the family. All his siblings married and had children. None ever got divorced. One of Dad’s nephews lost his wife after she had given birth to a little girl who was then raised by the second wife as though it was her own. The nephew also had a son with the second wife.
Mum’s other sister had only one child. This was my cousin Sigrid. Sigrid was four years my senior. She was a great person: Outgoing, fun loving, very musical. I adored her. She was such good company. She married a dentist. The dentist divorced Sigrid in a very amiable way. I think their two children were grown up already at the time. Walter, the dentist, then married his receptionist and had a child with her. Sigrid remained good friends with Walter and his new wife.
When I met Peter, my future husband, it turned out, his parents were divorced too. Maybe this is another story along with the divorce of one of our daughters.
Auntie, Sister. Grandmother, Great-Grandmother, Mother and Wife of German Descent I’ve lived in Australia since 1959 together with my husband Peter. We have four children, eight grandchildren and two great-grandchildren. I started blogging because I wanted to publish some of my childhood memories. I am blogging now also some of my other memories. I like to publish some photos too as well as a little bit of a diary from the present time. Occasionally I publish a story with a bit of fiction in it. Peter, my husband, is publishing some of his stories under berlioz1935.wordpress.com View all posts by auntyuta
catterelEditDivorce usually leaves sharp jagged edges that hurt everyone involved in the relationship, parent and children alike. Even where parents refrain from badmouthing one another, I believe the children are inevitably torn between mother and father. But – besser ein Ende mit Schrecken als Schrecken ohne Ende.Reply
auntyutaEdit“Besser ein Ende mit Schrecken als Schrecken ohne Ende.” I agree, Cat, if the parents can refrain from badmouthing one another after a separation the children might still be torn between mother and father, however in this case an ending of the marriage is probably beneficial for all concerned in the long run.Reply
rangewriterEditRelationships are so complicated. This is an area in my life where I have not done well. What I do understand, however, is that women today have far more options to control their own destiny than in former times. The result is that if a marriage isn’t working, it is relatively simply to disengage from it. Simple legally, but never emotionally. Who knows what completely bizarre strains the German politics of the 1920-40s put upon all relationships.Often, people were forced to compromise their principles in ways we cannot and don’t want to imagine. And then the heart remembers those compromises and finds reconciliation difficult. My heart bleeds for your mom, your dad, and you and your siblings for the upheaval that ensued.While all divorce leaves a wake of confusion and grief, much of that pain can be ameliorated if only the parents can bring themselves to act like adults. Refraining from badmouthing a former spouse can be difficult, but it is a parental duty.Reply
auntyutaEditI did not do that well all the time either, Linda, even though I have been married now for close tor 58 years. But believe me, there were periods in my life when the togetherness did not seem all that harmonious. Sometimes I very much questioned my ability to function as a wife and mother. It can be hard work to make a marriage work; most important seems to be to keep love alive somehow. When love is regularly turning into hate, we have to face up to it that the marriage is unsustainable. Should my mother and father never have married? Then my brothers and I would not exist. But as far as there staying together is concerned, well, this is a different matter. I do accept that for them it was better that they separated and later on were divorced. It would definitely have been better if they could have done this without all this fighting. You say, Linda: Refraining from badmouthing a former spouse can be difficult, but it is a parental duty. In this regard I stand totally on the side of my father. In my experience he never badmouthed my mother. Even though he tended to be extremely emotional and hurt by my mother’s rejection of him, he always stressed that he did not want us children to have a bad relationship with her for she was our mother. When I let my mother feel that I did not reject my father she tended to be angry with me ‘for taking his side’. The way I saw it, my mother was totally guided by her emotions, whereas my father tried very hard to act as an adult towards us children.Reply
cardamone5EditAh, Aunty Uta, how glad I am that we found each other. You are blessed in your marriage to Peter, having not had good role models. I often find myself struggling with how to be the right wife, but my husband is enormously loving and forgiving. He is my rock (in the good sense that he doesn’t go anywhere if I break down, which I have done twice, and in the challenging sense that he is very stubborn.) I have no doubt that my own lack of role models will not effect the longevity of our marriage. We have been together for a long time already and have withstood all trials and joys. In fact, yesterday, we celebrated early our fifteen year wedding anniversary. It was lovely. Thanks for echoing my experience with your post.Fondly, ElizabethReply
auntyutaEditThanks very much for this beautiful comment, dear Elizabeth. I think, we, as women, cannot praise men like our husbands, highly enough! Cheerio, UtaReply
elizabeth2560EditYour post spells out the difficulties all those affected by divorce have. It goes down through the generations. And I know that much advice says that we (the divorced) should ‘act like adults’ but I think sometimes it is much more difficult for the ‘leavee’ to cope. For example, I know that I cannot pretend to be ‘friends’ as it is simply too painful. However, civility is managed most of the time.Reply
auntyutaEditOf course, Elizabeth, to be friends requires that you have overcome pain or maybe not felt much pain in the first place. However I think it is a great achievement if you can manage civility most of the time. Sadly my mother was not capable of this at all. Thanks very much for commenting, dear Elizabeth.Reply
elizabeth2560EditThank YOU for this series of posts. I have connected with them and I have been interested by your views on this topic.
auntyutaEditI thank you very much for your comments, dear Elizabeth! Means a lot to me. Thank you.
Helen Mirren played Elizabeth II in the movie THE QUEEN. We watched this movie last night on TV. This movie made me think about the issue of divorce in our society. I contemplated what leads to divorce, and how it effects our lives, for example in my own family but also in families like the British Royal family. Often one can see the signs that lead to divorce, but sometimes a divorce can come more or less totally unexpected.
First I want to say how well I think Helen Mirren portrayed the queen. We already saw several movies with Helen Mirren as British queens.
Wikipedia says apart from Elizabeth II Helen Mirren portrayed these queens: “The first was a queen consort, Charlotte of Mecklenburg-Strelitz in The Madness of King George (1994), for which she was nominated for an Academy Award for Best Supporting Actress; the second was a queen regnant, Elizabeth I, in the 2005 miniseries Elizabeth I. She also played a policewoman, under cover as the Queen, in The Fiendish Plot of Dr. Fu Manchu.”
THE QUEEN is a 2006 British drama film that depicts the aftermath of the death of Diana, Princess of Wales, who died on 31 August 1997. I remember, how shocked we all were about her death. After her divorce from Prince Charles the media had kept haunting her unceasingly. I ask myself, did the public expect her to live like a nun after her divorce? Probably not. However the interest in Diana’s private life was kept alive by a very intrusive media. She was an extremely good looking, very kind woman. The public just loved her. The excessive media attention led to disaster. In the end not only Britain but the whole world was grieving her death.
I recall an interview with Diana as she opened up about her marriage. She said it was like there were three people in the marriage. She came across as being very honest and heartbroken about it. I think she felt as though she did not have a husband any more. She had fulfilled her duty to give the throne two heirs. Now Prince Charles felt free to follow his muse. Diana was too young and fun loving for him. She played no big part in his life. He probably had married her more or less only because she was young and good looking and likely to give him some children. But it turned out he had no real connection to her. She wanted some affection in her marriage. She did not get it the way she felt she needed it. How very tragic! Divorce followed after a long struggle. The rest is history, as the saying goes.
There were quite a few divorces in my immediate family: First my favourite aunt was divorced, then my parents were divorced, my husband’s parents were also divorced, my favourite cousin was divorced, also one of my daughters did get a divorce (in her twenties!), one of my brothers got a divorce. And so it goes. It seems there were plenty of divorces within my immediate family. Have divorces increased during the past fifty or a hundred years? Probably. Is divorce always a disaster? And who benefits from a divorce?
These are very general questions. I would say more often than not one partner wants a divorce to be able to marry someone else. The partner who is left behind may initially feel quite deserted but in time adjust to the new conditions and possibly be able to find solace in being free again. Sometimes divorce may be due to difficult economic circumstances . . . .
Does a deteriorating love life necessarily lead to divorce? Yes and no. After a man has been married for a number of years, he may wonder what it might be like with somebody else. He may feel that some new exciting love affair would be quite a challenge. What man can resist if an attractive woman indicates to him that she could be willing? The man tumbles into a new relationship. The new woman is hopeful the man is going to leave his wife and marry her. So he needs to get a divorce. Then he can marry the new woman. As simple as this.
In the ‘old’ days some women would refuse to grant the husband a divorce. Then maybe the husband would just live apart from his wife with the other woman. Sooner or later the other woman might find another man who could marry her. Then perhaps the first wife would end up with her husband living at home again. Or not, if she found it impossible to forgive him. Or found someone else herself in the meantime!
If a woman falls in love with a man who is married already, is it morally right if this woman accepts the advances of a married man. They both might feel they are made for each other. It may turn out then that the first woman is left behind. The new woman might be married herself and end up asking for a divorce if she wants to stay with the new man.
So far I have never mentioned children of divorced marriages. If there are any young children involved this can complicate matters quite a lot. I’ll write about my thoughts on this some other time.
Auntie, Sister. Grandmother, Great-Grandmother, Mother and Wife of German Descent I’ve lived in Australia since 1959 together with my husband Peter. We have four children, eight grandchildren and two great-grandchildren. I started blogging because I wanted to publish some of my childhood memories. I am blogging now also some of my other memories. I like to publish some photos too as well as a little bit of a diary from the present time. Occasionally I publish a story with a bit of fiction in it. Peter, my husband, is publishing some of his stories under berlioz1935.wordpress.com View all posts by auntyuta
The EmuEditHaving divorced my first two wives Uta, I am not game enough to mention the word with Ana. Diana’s divorce was a disgrace to Prince Charles, he lost a lot of credibility then. EmuReply
auntyutaEditThanks for commenting, dear Emu. As far as Prince Charles is concerned, yes, he probably lost a lot of credibility in the eyes of a lot of people. I feel for Diana, but I also feel for Charles. They just were not suited to each other for a long term relationship. Aunty UtaReply
elizabeth2560EditYou give a balanced view here on divorce. Are you still affected by your parents divorce even though it was many years ago and they have both passed on? Is it hard looking back on old photographs when discussing the family tree and your heritage and family traditions?Reply
auntyutaEditThanks for the questions, dear Elizabeth. The post World War II years were rather difficult for us. The divorce of my parents made everything probably more difficult than it should have been. But I knew both my parents always loved me. I felt I was a bit of a disappointment for my mum. I loved her, but I did not want to be like her. I developed my own character and I am what I am. No regrets. I mean my mum was a very capable, good looking woman. For a lot of things I did admire her a lot. That she did not want to have my father around, well, I do not blame her for this, She just had not affectionate feelings for him any more. I accept this and understand this even though I did not feel at all like this myself.Reply
elizabeth2560EditI think that it is a very big step in one’s own personal development to decide that you do not want to be like your mother. It is a fundamental step of your own character development. You have much integrity and kindness and being true to yourself has been an inspiration to me.
auntyutaEditYou see, Elizabeth, it was not that I did not love my mother. I loved her a lot. But I could not be like her. A much stronger role model for me was for instance my father’s younger sister. Her name was Elisabeth. I called her Tante Lies. I always wanted to be more like her. You are right, being true to myself, I find this very important. Thanks, Elizabeth.
We knew already well over two years ago, that Peter would not be able to survive his cancer. –
So, more than two years ago, we did know, that the spread of his cancer from the bladder to the bones, could not be prevented!
A major operation on his bladder had not been possible, because he had a very serious heart condition.
As far as I am concerned, I must say it still did come as a kind of a shock to me, when it happened, that all of a sudden I had to completely live on my own!
However, right now, I am really glad, that I can live on my own, and that I am not dependent on anyone in the family to stay with me 24/7! 🙂
cardamone5
AuntyUta 